Let's Not Say Goodbye
by wolflover43
Summary: "I love you." That's all I can manage to say. I don't trust my voice. I'm too worried it will crack and she'll be worried about me. About my pain when she's the one laying in the hospital bed. "I love you too." Her voice is hoarse, but still sweet. Like honey. Music to my ears. I get to talk to her. I just hope it's not the last time. I don't want it to be the last time. (One-Shot)


**Disclaimer: I don't own the Divergent. All rights belong to Veronica Roth.**

"Sir, your wife was in a car accident. It's unknown if she will survive." Those fourteen words cause the world to come crashing down on me. My world, my life is shattered. Obliterated. It dissolves into nothingness. "C-can I see her?" I ask almost inaudibly. My voice is almost gone. I am unable to speak. I can't speak. I don't want to speak. Not without knowing what her condition is. "Sir, I don't think-" I don't let him continue. I grab him by the collar of his shirt and shove him against the wall. Anger begins to overtake me. They have no right to keep her from me. "Let me see her." I say the words quietly. My rage is overflowing, but I don't shout. Shouting is something everyone does when they are angry. I don't. I will never shout. I become quiet, which according to my wife, makes me seem even more frightening.

"O-okay sir. I can let you see her. But only for five minutes." Five minutes. That's all I want. That's all I need. Five minutes to tell my wife how much I love her. I nod my head, slowing releasing and stepping away from the doctor. I watch him walk to a door at the far end of the brightly lit hospital hallway. He takes to quick glances around and motions me forward. I take slow-careful-steps toward her room. The room that has my wife. Injured or dead. As much as I would hate to admit it, I would rather see her injured than dead. No scratch that. I would rather be in her place. Take any pain away from her.

"Five minutes sir. And you can't tell anyone I let you in." His words enter my mind, but they don't register. Everything is becoming muffled. Right now, all that matters is that I get to see my wife. He pushes open the door and forces me inside. He quickly closes the door, faster than he opened it.

I can't look up. My gaze stays on the white marble of the floor. The light reflects off of the perfectly polished white tile. Nothing can be that perfect. There must be something wrong with the tile. There is. This tile is part of the room that holds my possible dying wife. That's its imperfection. The most overlooked, yet the biggest detail. The one that sets it apart from another room.

I force myself to look at the bed. A bed that usually contains perfectly pressed white sheets. So white and clean. That's how everything is in the hospital. Except it's not perfect. It's far from perfect. When I do look at the supposedly perfect bed, the image horrifies me.

Laying in the bed is my wife, connected to so many wires that I lose count. I take quick strides. I cannot waste any more time. The five minutes will run out faster than I want to. I arrive at the bed and see her wide awake. Her eyes full of confusion, but also the familiar look. A look that I have come to love.

"I love you." That's all I can manage to say. I don't trust my voice. I'm too worried it will crack and she'll be worried about me. About my pain when she's the one laying in the hospital bed. "I love you too." Her voice is hoarse, but still sweet. Like honey. Music to my ears. I get to talk to her. I just hope it's not the last time. I don't want it to be the last time.

"Don't cry. Please don't." My wife is begging me to stay strong. But how can I when she is laying in front of me? I find it almost laughable that she is the one trying to stay strong. "Listen to me." I force myself to look into her eyes. They still show power, but it's fading. "We both know the truth. And I'm sorry. But do me one last favor. Move on. Get remarried and have kids. Please." I shake my head. No there is no one out there for me. She is the one I love. The only person I truly love.

"N-No. I don't care if it's your last wish. I will never fall out of love with you. I can't. You've stolen my heart and there is no way of it returning to me. It belongs to you and only you." My wife has tears in her eyes. From pain or something else, I don't know. And I don't care. I grab my wife's hand and squeeze it. I hold onto it like it may be the last time. Which it very well may be.

No, I refuse to think like this. She will survive. "Please. It's the only thing I want from you." I can't control them anymore. The hot tears I tried to keep from over flowing begin to roll freely down my face. "No. My heart it yours and no one else can have it. It's rightfully yours." She sighs and closes her eyes. She's not dead. I can see the steady rise and fall of her chest.

"Fine. I don't want to argue right now." My wife sits up and pulls me toward her. She presses her lips to mine and I feel the familiar heat and electricity. But this time it seems like a goodbye. Not one that says I will see you soon. But one that represents farewell.

When she pulls away, I find that I have fallen to my knees, right next to her head. "I love you so much." I shake my head. Slowly. She says it like it's a definite goodbye. "D-don't say it like it is goodbye. This isn't goodbye. I'm not ready to say goodbye. I don't want to say it." I rest my head on the side of her bed, with my head almost touching her arm. I silently sob. I can't let her see me like this. I always wanted to be the strong one, but maybe I never was. Maybe it was her.

"Then let's not say goodbye." She lifts my head so I can meet her eyes. Could this really be it? Could this be the time I really lose her? I don't want it to be, but maybe it is. Maybe I have to accept the inevitable. "Let's say hello." She takes a deep breath. Her blue-grey eyes burn into my dark blue. I will remember them-her-until I die. I will never forget. "Hello Tobias."

I choke back a sob and whisper her name, only letting it be loud enough for her to be able to hear it. "Hello Tris."


End file.
